Antwerp had waited not a decade or two, nor half a century – but 66 years for a Belgian league title. The drought ended thanks to Toby Alderweireld, a man who once stood tearfully on a train platform, glaring defiantly at his father for sending him to Amsterdam. Toby’s stunning last-minute goal in the 94th minute brought the title to his beloved hometown club in one of the craziest championship races, fulfilling dreams that began when he was just a boy running after a ball in Antwerp.The Great Old (Royal Antwerp) rose again with Alderweireld, becoming champions in the 2022/2023 season. He had finally come home to play for his city’s club — but it almost didn’t happen. In an emotional interview with VRT1, Alderweireld opened up about his biggest fears, his battles with panic attacks, and his long journey home.At just 15 years old, Toby left Antwerp for Ajax in Amsterdam, a move fiercely opposed by his mother, Marina, who believed her son was not emotionally equipped for the life of a top-level athlete. Despite her protests, his older brother convinced their father it was a necessary step.”If I didn’t go, we’d regret it forever,” Toby recalled of the moment the decision was made.##NAJAVA_MECA_8511127##Adjusting to a new life in Amsterdam wasn’t easy for the teenager, partly because of the language barrier and partly due to overwhelming homesickness.”Many people try to help you, but you have to deal with homesickness on your own. Knowing what I know now, honestly, I don’t know if I’d do it all again. For the first six months, my father drove me to Amsterdam every weekend, but after that, I had to take the train from Antwerp. I’d stand on the platform, holding back tears and angry at my dad. I didn’t want to go—I wanted to stay home. They told me I could return if I wasn’t happy, but my father, being from a different generation, insisted I finish what I started.”He persevered, pushed by his father’s belief that things would get better. But the emptiness lingered — until the day he returned to Antwerp 17 years later.”My father told me the homesickness would fade. He’d say, ‘Just hold on, it’ll pass.’ I believed it too, but it never did. That longing for home never left me. Throughout my career, I often thought about quitting. If the people around me had felt the same way, I probably would’ve walked away. No one can fully understand, but it’s something that was always inside me.”Former Spurs centre-back Toby Alderweireld on why he retired from international football: “After the lost cup match against Union I was angry and frustrated.”I couldn’t sleep that night and went to the club early the next morning to do a strength session. Before I left, I took a… pic.twitter.com/RUZAr6MpWa— Chris Cowlin (@ChrisCowlin) November 18, 2024 In 2022, just months before joining Antwerp, Alderweireld experienced two major panic attacks that landed him in the emergency room.”After losing a cup match against Union, I was angry and frustrated. I couldn’t sleep that night. Early the next morning, I went to the club to train. Before I left, I took a caffeine pill because I don’t like coffee,” Toby recounted.But something went wrong during the drive.”Suddenly, my heart started beating a thousand times a minute! I thought I was having a heart attack — that I was going to die.”The most terrifying thought?”I’m done. I’ll never see my kids again.”He managed to pull over, get out of the car, and seek help.”I stopped, went into a furniture store, and asked, ‘Can you call an ambulance?’ When they arrived, my heart had slowed down. Later that night, it happened again, and I had to call an ambulance again. It turned out my heart was racing due to stress. It was a panic attack, but I thought I was dying.”##EDITORS_CHOICE##The club kept the incidents under wraps, ensuring no details leaked.”We ran extreme stress tests, and everything was fine. I started talking to people about what happened, and they told me it was caused by excessive stress—pure panic attacks. I still experience them occasionally, but now I know it’s nothing serious, and that helps me accept it.”In 2023, Toby shocked many by announcing his retirement from the Belgian national team. He revealed the real reason only to head coach Domenico Tedesco: repeated panic attacks.”That’s why I left the national team. I had a great time at five major tournaments, but I’ve closed that chapter,” Alderweireld explained.Finally back in Antwerp, the city and club that had always held his heart, Alderweireld has found peace — but his journey to get there was far from easy.
